Debt Monsters

How to Stop Fighting Over Finances6 min read

Reading Time: 4 minutes Couples fighting over finances is a very common scenario all over the world. And if you’re one of those couples, fear not! We’ve got just the thing to take your problems away. Read on!

August 16, 2020 4 min read
Fighting Over Finances

How to Stop Fighting Over Finances6 min read

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Couples fighting over finances is a tale as old as time. No matter where you go, there will always be at least one financially-disturbed couple, and this has proven to be one of the major causes of disputes between couples these days.

With credit card usages on the rise, people are able to purchase almost anything even if they’re broke and can’t afford it. And businesses are taking full advantage of this. With their “great deals” and manipulative marketing strategies, they are somehow convincing thousands of people to make unnecessary purchases. And people are falling for these schemes almost every day, piling up huge debts until they finally hit rock bottom and realize they are financially insolvent.

You now have to worry about paying off this additional debt on top of your usual expenses, which can be very stressful. And when you talk to your partner about it, they flip out and start fighting you, which can create resentment among your partnership and worst-case scenario, you break up from each other.

Having constant fighting with your partner is never a solution and can be solved quite easily. You just have to plan your expenses and not make any irrational purchases. We are not saying that you have to stop buying stuff you like, just that there is time for everything, and you have to manage your finances accordingly.

There Should Be No Secrets Between Couples

What’s worse than having financial troubles is keeping them hidden from your partner. You might be an obsessive binge shopper and might have huge debts, but it’s always better to come out and say it to your partner rather than keep things hidden. The more you keep secrets, the more likely you are going to stumble into fighting with your partner. Dr. Bonnie Eaker, a leading couple’s therapist, addresses the impacts of keeping secrets in her book “Financial Infidelity: Seven Steps to Conquering the #1 Relationship Wrecker”.

In this book, Bonnie advises readers not to keep secrets such as binge shopping habits and secret bank accounts from their partners, in turn that can result in fighting, and rather offers counsel so readers can differentiate between money and intimacy. It helps readers understand how money can open doors to countless lies and betrayals between partners. The book emphasizes that all relationships are worth more than money and are definitely worth preserving.

Learn How To Accumulate Your Money Properly

Even if you make a ton of money every month, it wouldn’t matter very much if you’re fighting with your partner about money and you don’t know how to accumulate it properly. John Soforic’s The Wealthy Gardener: Lessons on Prosperity Between Father and Son has some excellent philosophies on this matter. The author realized that most people spend their money on short term gains and provided advice on how to accumulate their hard-earned money ideally.

Eliminate Hidden Expenses And Set Your Priorities Straight

Setting your priorities straight can go a long way towards rehabilitating your relationship and restoring your financial status to its former glory. When you focus on the bigger picture, you suddenly realize that you have no room for unnecessary hidden expenses and automatically cut them off. As a result, both you and your partner can focus on building a financially-stable life together, instead of fighting, which is a pretty easy thing to do when you don’t have any hidden expenses weighing you down.

Financial Planning Is The Key To A Well-Oiled Relationship

Financial Planning

Every couple should keep a day aside to casually talk about finances and how to manage their expenses according to their incomes and set aside some money for retirement or in case any emergency expenses show up. “Dr Bonnie’s Financial Infidelity: Seven Steps to Conquering the #1 Relationship Wrecker” provides some great analogies on this matter. It teaches readers how to plan out their finances efficiently, so there are no surprises even if any huge expenses show up out of the blue.

It provides some do’s and don’ts when it comes to financial infidelity and talks about the emotional harm fighting can cause in a relationship. Moreover, Dr. Bonnie made some excellent links between money, sex, and love, which helps readers understand how to keep relationships and finances apart, so they don’t face any emotional fallout.

Don’t Just Save Up, Try To Make Your Money Grow

An important part of maintaining a happy relationship is to keep your partner’s needs fulfilled and keep upgrading them from time to time. Your expense grows as you upgrade your living standards, but your income is capped, so how do you afford it? Simple, you invest! Don’t get me wrong, saving up cash is good but it’s not really ideal for keeping good money locked up in banks.

Why keep all your money locked up in banks when you can make even more using them? “ The Wealthy Gardener: Lessons on Prosperity Between Father and Son” provides readers with some practical ideas on how to invest their money for future prosperity, so couples can lead their lives without ever having to worry about finances.

Financial Freedom Gives You Complete Control Of Your Life

Financial Freedom

Being financially-solvent is a huge achievement in this age. It helps you get rid of all financial insecurities and allows you and your partner to lead happy lives.“ The Wealthy Gardener: Lessons on Prosperity Between Father and Son” lists out some incredible points on why financial freedom matters and how you can achieve the power to control your lives. It doesn’t matter what your job is, how much money you make, what title you have, or your economic advantages; this book has some great advice on how you and your partner can achieve complete financial freedom and never have to worry about fighting over finances.

Bottom line

Our lifetime on this planet is limited, and it’s not really wise to spend a minute of it on something as petty as fighting over finances. There are only a few simple principles and ideas which would help everyone lead financially-fulfilling and stress-free lives. We know life is tough for everyone and fighting will inevitably happen, but as John Soforic’s book suggests, you have to find the desire to succeed and the motivation to push through, not for for yourself and your family. Nothing else matters in the end, just that you lead a positive, happy, and, fulfilling life with your partner by your side for your family.